"Hey man, how you doing?" It's a typical query. Everytime I use that phrase or some permutation thereof, I want to kick myself in the ass. I just said that exact phrase no more than 10 minutes ago. I don't give a fuck how anyone is doing.
The real shitty part of the whole exchange is the waiting. Wait for the answer long enough and you know you're in trouble. Like lightning across the night sky, my head is filled with flashes of terror. All those horrible thoughts revolve around the small chance that this particular query will end with some sort of forced empathy.
If the wait is too long, how shall I respond? No one has to think about how they are doing. Like today, it's warm, it's not raining and it's Friday. I'm fucking great. Two days ago when it was freezing outside and I had a bunch of classes left this week I was fucking bummed out.
There's about six and a half minutes left of class for the week and I'm riding pretty on this cloud of mine. The only weight holding my high down is the bald man with wire rimmed glasses rambling on about ching chong chang or some shit in my Religions of China class. He's down under 5 minutes left, so I'll let him ramble for now.
One other hurdle I have before I can satiate my desire for the peaceful, the slothlike, the Friday afternoon, is someone, anyone really, I might see on the way home from class. I've resolved to not ask them how they are doing, but I won't wait for them to ask me either, because I'm fucking dandy.
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